Saturday, May 26, 2018

A Signologist's Last Will & Testament

A Signologist's Last Will & Testament 
March 31st, 2018

To My Banker: I leave the hard earned dust that forever sits in My Savings Account; the IRS man can explain it.
(airbrush on truck hood)

To My Family that was there next to me when I was struggling to find the right ending for My story, I leave You My bravery for the mourning that is ahead. Maybe by the time My brushes are immersed in paint thinner, You will realize that My "greatest masterpiece" was the life I shared with all of You during the 70 years of My red road journey. Aho.

       To My Carpenter Son, George Jr., I leave the responsibility of installing the signs I just finished. Though planning ahead was never My forte or even the utmost of importance, here are the resources to complete this job. The hardware is on the top shelf of the paint cabinet; in the Chock Full O'Nuts coffee can, the 2nd smallest to Your left. Although You will have to assemble them, a rough sketch of instructions sits atop My easel. Once drawn, never forgotten. 

To My Fellow Artist but never a competitor, Jeff Smith @ The Sign Depot in Newtown, CT; Our working relationship has always been as complex & simple as Brothers. Brothers in One-Shot Lettering Enamel, sign machines & pounce patterns. Always as a team; sharing as both a teacher & friend. You always wondered why I was so creative, yet You never saw the answer in Yourself. I leave You, with love, the countless milk crates containing every Sign Craft magazine in My collection. You'll notice the lack of dust on the crates & pages, for this, was My "search engine". There are also several completed signs & projects that customers neglected to pick up. I trust that You will have the heart to Re-Purpose, Re-Use & Re-Cycle.

To My Suppliers: I humbly request that You each act as My Pallbearers, as You have always carried Me before.

To the Gravediggers: Don't overdo it, the hole I'm already in should be deep enough.

To the Merchants & the Business People in this United States, I leave a legacy of "fair trade", "cash on the barrel" & the unique signage that You now possess. 


To My Children: I leave all of the unforgotten memories of the old shops that defined My past & created every part of Your future. Vivid memories of the times We've spent together tinkering with handcrafted, elaborate toy cars displaying pinstripes & gold leaf, a high chair fit for a Queen, custom Halloween costumes & the school projects that were collaborated on & always won 1st place. Thank You, for the times You became Daddy's good little helper & soaked out 4-by-8's & filled in those rush banners. The memories most imprinted into My heart are when You mostly sat upon Your Daddy's lap as a baby & just watched for hours.

To My Dear Wife, the most stubborn yet understanding woman that I have ever met. Cheryl, You stayed by My side 'til the very end though many times You questioned Your better judgment. You learned not to wait up for supper, but, surprised Me every now & then with a cold bottle of Heineken at 2:00 in the morning. I always looked forward to seeing Your smile when I came home, even late from a job. Heaven holds a special place for You, My Eternal Sweetheart. When it is time for Us to be together again, You will be guided along the fields of daffodils, directed by My final sign that simply states, "Welcome Home".
(taken March 2003 @ 70th surprise party)

Andy's Sign & Art Studio,
Bait Shop, Grave Pillows

"Let Andy Do It"
George "Andy" Kalina, Sr.,
but the special people in My life call Me
Son, Husband, Daddy, Pop, Brother, "Unk", Tall Man's Medicine, Friend, Colleague...
but most of all;

Signologist
(1933~2003)

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